giggling

That’s the way I think of my mother Jeanne, probably a lot of you do to. Mothers have a great influence on their children, since most of the caring of a child falls on the mother. Even before birth bonding between mother and child begins, and no matter how old we get our mothers still speak of us as if we were still children.

Another Mothers Day is approaching, and it brings back sad but happy memories of my mother whom died on April 30th 2008, and was buried a couple of days after Mother’s Day. The mother of 8 children, to me she was a Mother like no Other. She cared not only about her own children, but everybody else’s children.

She set a good example for us girls, there were six of us, I was the oldest of all eight children with only two boys in the family. If we asked her for some advice on anything, she would always answered: “Did you ask your father already? It’s alright with me, but see what he says also”. Or go and ask your father, if he agrees then it’s okay with me”. And Dad would likewise do the same, asking us if we already discussed it with our mother. We were trained to always discuss anything with both parents. This has taught us to respect our parents and honor their advice.

She never carried herself around the house in a robe or rollers in her hair. She got up early, made her bed, and dressed up before going out to the kitchen to prepare breakfast for my father and her children. She believed that a woman should always carry herself with dignity, even if she was only a stay at home Mom. She made her own clothes, and taught me to do the same. A skill I am glad I have even today.

I remembered after moving to New York, and returning home on vacation to the island where I was born and where my parents lived, on St.Maarten, in the Dutch Caribbean I wore a pair of old jeans and sneakers. Mam took one look at me, and said: ”You better get a pair of new sneakers while you’re here, you are not going anywhere with me dressed like that!”

Another time I was going out to dinner with my brother and his wife, and again Mam made me change what I was wearing as she didn’t think it was elegant enough to have dinner at one of the hotels. Yes, you won’t dare carry yourself any old way around Mam! Even as a grown woman  if she didn’t think what I wore looked good, she made me change into something she believed was more suitable. 

Mam was generous and kind, she always had an extra plate of food for a neighbor’s child, or a visitor dropping in, and even for those working around the house. Our house was often full of people. There was always extra food on the stove or in the oven for a visitor. If the plumber came to repair the toilet or the kitchen sink, she waited until he was finished, and after paying him, she pulled a chair out and put a plate of food on the table and said: “Please have something to eat before you leave”. Now I understand why something was always wrong with that toilet, and the plumber kept returning!

As she got older she sometimes forgot our names. When calling one of us she started with all our names before she got to the correct child she meant to call. “Can you come here please, Glenda, Susan, Debra, John, Tim….. .and she would go down the list of all eight of us childrens names, and then, “What’s that child name?  Oh, yes I meant Susan!” And she sometimes put words in the wrong place in a sentence. Like asking us to pull the window back so she can see through the drapes, or put the bed under the shoes, instead of pulling the drapes back so she can see through the window, or putting the shoes under the bed!

Yes, she was funny and made us laugh. She really loved her children, and took time to sing and dance with us when we were young.  After moving to New York, I used to get some long handwritten letters from Mam, five pages long or more.  I remembered saving some of those letters even now. It is nice to go back and read them again, written in her own handwriting.

Later when she developed arthritis in her hand, she couldn’t write like before, so we talked a lot by phone, and she always ended the call with: “I love you, I still have hope in you”. She wanted me to succeed in whatever I do. Even as a grown woman it was so nice to hear your mother say those words.

Every time I look in the mirror it seems like I am looking at her. As I resembled my mother in so many ways, only she was far more beautiful! Lovely olive skin with no wrinkles, and a straight nose that Movie Stars will pay thousands of dollars for! And even at the age of 77 when she died she had no gray hair! And it was not dyed either! Well, to me she was a Star that never got discovered!

Well, I can go on for hours musing on my wonderful mother Jeanne, whom I really missed. Especially around this time of the year, Mother’s Day will be her one year anniversary since her death. When she died I refused to go and see my mother’s dead body. I never want to have that image of her in my mind. To me she was immortal, a beautiful person inside and out, she couldn’t die!  So I don’t ever want to dwell on her being dead. I have happy memories of her being alive, her laughter, her great cooking, her voice on the phone, the funny things she said, the way she forgot our names and mixed them up, and these bring a smile to my face.  

When I started writing my Greeting Cards, I wrote them with my mother in mind and sent her a copy of each one. You can find these cards on my website. www.adnelg-creations.com. I really don’t believe there should be only one day for Mothers, they should be honored and cherished all year round. Even if your mother is not the kind of mother you wish you had, no matter what, she is still your mother! If she is alive, appreciate and cherish her and let her know how much you care, not only this Mother’s Day, but everyday!

Mothers are unique, they play so many roles in the live of a child, how we turn out to be later in life has a lot to do with the way our mothers raised us. You have one of the greatest privileges and God given assignments on earth! And if you are a single mother never underestimate the great role you play in your child’s life. Some of the greatest men and women were raised by single women. Look at our new President!

Yes, all you mothers, carry out your assignment with dignity and love, and set a good example for your children, when they grow older hope they will say of you as I say of my own mother: “She was a Mother like no Other”.

For Greetings Cards, Children’s Books & shopping go to: www.adnelg-creations.com

Written by (C) Glenda Brill (Giggling)

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